FORWARDED
HEADLINES
Bata nalunod, natagpuan…basa!
Palaisdaan, nasunog!!!
Tahanang Walang Hagdan, inakyat!!!
Bakla sumali sa away, napasubo!!!
Bagong tuli nagyabang, lumaki ang ulo!!!
Bulag nakapatay, nagdilim daw ang paningin!!!
Tindera ng suka, tinoyo!!!
Teacher nagkamali, tinuruan ng leksyon!!!
Eroplano nag-crash, lahat ng pasahero namatay sabi ng mga survivor!!!
Basurero nagsampa ng kaso, binasura!!!
Dahil may reklamo, eskwelahan ng mga bingi, nag-noise barrage!!!
Tubero, nagka-tulo!!!
Lalaki natagpuang pugot ang ulo, inaalam pa kung buhay!!!
Barbero tumestigo sa krimen, ayaw paniwalaan!!!
Misis ng photographer, nakunan!!!
Tindera ng tubig, namatay sa uhaw!!!
Kaso ng pilay, nilalakad!!!
Invisible man, nakita na!
THE PERFECT HEART
from Arnel G. Matias
One day a young man was standing in the middle of the town proclaiming that he had the most beautiful heart in the whole valley. A large crowd gathered and they all admired his heart for it was perfect. There was not a mark or a flaw in it. Yes, they all agreed it truly was the most
beautiful heart they had ever seen. The young man was very proud and boasted more loudly about his beautiful heart.
Suddenly, an old man appeared at the front of the crowd and said "Why your heart is not nearly as beautiful as mine." The crowd and the young man looked at the old man's heart. It was beating strongly, but full of scars, it had places where pieces had been removed and other pieces put in, but they didn't fit quite right and there were several jagged edges. In fact, in some places there were deep gouges where whole pieces were missing.
The people stared - how can he say his heart is more beautiful, they thought? The young man looked at the old man's heart and saw its state and laughed. "You must be joking," he said. "Compare your heart with mine, mine is perfect and yours is a mess of scars and tears."
"Yes," said the old man, "Yours is perfect looking but I would never trade with you. You see, every scar represents a person to whom I have given my love - I tear out a piece of my heart and give it to them, and often they give me a piece of their heart which fits into the empty
place in my heart, but because the pieces aren't exact, I have some rough edges, which I cherish, because they remind me of the love we shared. Sometimes I have given pieces of my heart away, and the other person hasn't returned a piece of his heart to me. These are the empty
gouges -- giving love is taking a chance.
Although these gouges are painful, they stay open, reminding me of the love I have for these people too, and I hope someday they may return and fill the space I have waiting. So now do you see what true beauty is?"
The young man stood silently with tears running down his cheeks. He walked up to the old man, reached into his perfect young and beautiful heart, and ripped a piece out. He offered it to the old man with trembling hands. The old man took his offering, placed it in his heart and then took a piece from his old scarred heart and placed it in the wound in the young man's heart. It fit, but not perfectly, as there were some jagged edges. The young man looked at his heart, not perfect
anymore but more beautiful than ever, since love from the old man's heart flowed into his. They embraced and walked away side by side.
True story: ((daw!))
from HidaLGO DE aRRABAL
Last week, I left Manila with a couple of friends heading toward Punta Fuego in Batangas, when I decided to stop at a comfort station in a relatively new Gas station in Tagaytay. Being a new gas station, this place would have a clean banyo and pwede na just right clean facility to take a good crap : )
The first stall was occupied (my theory was correct) so I went into the second one. Just when I was seated and poised to emit a very "silent" fart, I heard a voice from the next toilet: "Hi, how are you doing?" Putek!!! I thought in my mind. I am certainly not the type to chat with strangers in highway comfort rooms or any comfort room for that >matter. Normally, I would keep as dead silent as possible in a situation like this so no one would think I was there. What was I to do? run? keep quiet? So many questions in my mind. I really don't know quite what possessed me, but anyway, I answered, a little embarrassed: "OK LANG, pare!" And the stranger said: "Whats up with you?"
Talk about your unnervingly dumb questions! WHO THE HELL IS THIS GUY? (In my mind) I was really beginning to think this was just TOO WEIRD! So I said: "WELL, JUST LIKE YOU I'M MAKING TAE."
Then, I heard the person, all upset, say, "Look, I'll call you back, there's some idiot in the next toilet answering all the questions I am asking you."
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posted by Tanghalang Anluwage, Inc. @ 12:03 AM
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